Songs and Conversations

Faithful Innovation
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Songs and Conversations, Christ Church, Woodbury
By David Waletzko

I wanted a time, right after the sermon, when the congregation would debate and discuss what they had just heard. Not to rip it apart, though people would be welcome to do so, but also to say how it inspired them, or how it related to whatever thing they had going on. 

And so, after discussing this with my priest, we decided to launch Songs and Conversations. This offering has facilitated a place where people can be themselves without needing to put on niceness filters, or pretend that we all agree about everything. It’s place where you share a song that’s meaningful to you or unload about something that has happened to you, and the people there not only listen, but came there to listen.  

The first rule of Songs and Conversations is that when you are speaking about how you are doing, you can’t just say “fine.” There is always more to it than that.

The second rule is that you don’t discuss what is discussed at Songs and Conversations. That allows people to be free to be themselves, and talk about others in their lives, without fear of reprisal. In essence, Songs and Conversations is:

  • A place where you can express the thoughts you’ve been told you aren’t supposed to have, that mean you are a bad person. And then, once shared, others may say they have had the same thoughts, and you are not alone, but loved and treasured, and it is understandable that you feel that way.
  • A place where you can brag about your child’s accomplishments for ten minutes straight, and no one minds, and in fact will find joy in your joy, and celebrate with you.
  • A place where you don’t feel compelled to say anything if you don’t want to, but know that the option is there if you so choose.
  • A place where masks can safely be removed, and you can be and say who and what you truly are.

What I’ve seen is an overwhelmingly positive response from those who have come.  As regular participant Jenamarie Wilkinson observed, “Songs and Conversations has been a wonderful place to share together in a way that's difficult to do during a casual, bustling coffee hour. I learn more about my siblings in Christ through the songs they choose to share, and why those songs are meaningful to them. And in our conversations I've been able to find others who've walked a difficult road I'm currently walking, and the lessons they've shared have been immensely helpful. We also celebrate each other's successes and positive experiences. It feels like pure Christian community, and I look forward to it every month.”

I’ve felt a deeper connection to the people there after just one session than I ever felt after spending years next to them in the pews. Tears and hugs are not uncommon, and I take that as a sign of healing and connection. With everyone feeling, and being so isolated from each other now, that alone makes it worth it.  

Songs and Conversations has taken on a life of its own, with sessions scheduled at the insistence of members, not the “leaders,” if those of us who founded it can be called that. If people are willing to schedule additional sessions on their own, even when there isn’t “supposed” to be one at that time, it is clearing filling a need or desire that many of us share.